Last night, joy showed up.
I was open to it (my joy mantra is Stay Open for Joy).
Instead of doing all the things, and making my daughter — who tends to move very slowly at bedtime in all the directions except her bed — do all the things.
I laid down on my bed and waited for her.
She had been a bit off all afternoon and evening.
“I’m so tired,” she would mutter during homework, during dinner, during the ride over to her piano lessons.
Her energy level was, at most, exhaustion.
At bedtime, in her bathrobe and with her book in hand, she laid down on the bed as well with me.
Stay open for joy.
And soon she crawled over to me, and slid into that place of love that we all know — the crook of my arm, that space where a mother’s dream is made of as if the divine created that space just for us to grow closer to each other.
At 12, this isn’t a common moment. You get what you get and you don’t get upset. 🙂
But, honestly, it’s my fault more than hers. I’m often so exhausted and ready for her dawdling to end that I demand too much, nag too much, expect too much at bedtime.
When what I really need to do is just stay open to joy and when I do, joy shows up and does NOT disappoint.
Open up and let the joy fall inside the crook of your arm.
This is the place of love.
And so we we settled into that place of love and connection for so long that I lost track of time and all sense of what needed to be done. All past mistakes and missteps lost and forgotten. I was enrapatured in her stories, how her feet rubbed against mine, how she held her blanket-bear that she’s had since birth, and how she felt so at home there, in the crook of my arm.
Stay open for joy.
Because in that moment I was lost in the reason we are here … this purpose that is beyond any other purpose we will have in this lifetime.
It’s so easy to get caught up in CREATING joy that we forget that joy is often much more simple, much more elementary.
The lesson here … stop trying so hard, Shawn.
Stay open to joy. It does not disappoint.