As I woke this morning, my first instinct was to rush out of bed to do my morning Rise and Shine ritual.

But, I stopped myself.


I laid back down.

I took several deep breaths.

I set my weekly intention.

And I allowed myself to just be. 

This is all part of my journey to being a more intentional woman — to being an Abundant Mama.

The No. 1 reason more than 900 women around the world have gone through The Abundant Mama Online Program is …

To be more present.

And by present they mean many things. Joy. Balance. Awake. Abundant. Grateful.

By present, they mean they want to love being a mother more than they do not. They want to feel more “on” than distracted.

And to do that we go through a number of steps that truly do help.

But none of my tools work if you are not able to soften — and lighten up. In fact, as a busy, Type-A human being myself, I’m putting a huge focus on deepening my own softening practice in the new year.


7 Blissful Ways to Soften and 7 Reasons Why You Should


What does it mean to soften?

It means to let go and release a good bit — of expectations, to-dos, control, goals and ambitions, feelings of enoughness.

It means to literally soften in our voice, in our throat, in our skin and in our muscles.

It means to tread lighter, move slower and be perfectly fine with less control.

Releasing is my favorite right after letting go and that’s why that week in the program is my personal favorite — because it’s the one I struggle the most with myself.

When we soften, though, we don’t relinquish our powers or authority and we don’t become pushovers and let our lives crumble.

The opposite.

We open and embrace more and we see more beauty, not less. We spend so much less time in the Land of Bitter and Sour.

And we are ripe for abundance.

Why soften?

When we soften we respond to our own internal needs and desires.

When we soften we automatically slow everything down and end the rushing battles.

When we soften we can listen to the needs of others we love and cherish.

When we soften we release stress that harms our bodies and our minds.

When we soften we model being present and awake in every moment.

When we soften we are able to show up and be playful in our life and with those we love.

When we soften we are able to make the right decisions at the right moment rather than react.

So what is the best way to soften?

Take a deep breath.

And intentionally tell your body to soften.

Soften now. 

And slowly release your muscles, starting with your toes, moving up your legs, into your back and stomach and up your arms and through your chest until finally … your shoulders fall away from your ears. Only when all of your muscles are relaxed — including your jaw and tongue and eye muscles — are you fully in a softened state.

How can you blissfully soften all day?

I’m pulling 7 ideas from a beautiful checklist that the women in my Abundant Mama Peace Circle created this past summer that has 101 Abundant Mama Ways to Nourish Yourself and Feel Blissful. These are all little ways to soften in five minutes or less. Do one per day for the next week.

  • Stretch or do some yoga.
  • Sit and do absolutely nothing.
  • Close your eyes and do the above body scan laying flat on the floor with a blanket.
  • Dance with wild abandon.
  • Give yourself a luxurious foot massage.
  • Wash your face and apply essential oils to your wrists and neck.
  • Laugh! Tell a joke or play tag or hide and seek. Just be silly.


Soften now. 

Softening around your own harsh, tense and stressed edges is a practice that will absolutely need to be practiced over and over

Being relaxed isn’t easy when our responsibilities are so great. Softening is hard when we feel like we have to constantly push those around us to the next thing, the next place, the next level, etc. Being light and loose is hard when we carry the weight of the world in our shoulders and in our jaws and around our necks.

But choosing to soften the minute you wake up as part of your own Rise and Shine practice — as well as throughout your day — is a great way to start experimenting with what it might feel like to live a more relaxed existence.


Soften now.

Discuss: How easy or how challenging is it for you to soften and relax in your day?

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7 blissful ways to soften


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