It happened, again.
I encouraged the mamas in the current Abundant Mama class to do something that many of them really, really, really do not like to do.
To Be still.
Stillness, as I’ve learned over the last few years, is the dirtiest word in motherhood.
When we are still we think we are lazy. Or unmotivated. Or missing out.
Oh the missing out!
And yet stillness creates opportunity. And bliss. And joy.
I find that when I achieve a bit of stillness in my day I am more productive. I actually do more meaningful tasks, not more busy work. The difference is remarkable.
The secret is not pushing ourselves to the point of total burnout, but rather to do everything — every act — at a slower pace. Stop trying to cram so much in. Stop trying to over-do motherhood.
Embrace stillness in everything you do.
I am calling this week Slow Mothering week.
As I do every year, I think about what you really need for Mother’s Day — and from this project … and I decided that what you really need is to take it easy. Like, really easy.
And I’m calling it Slow Mothering. And while I think every week is a great week to master slow mothering, I think this week is particularly wonderful because the gift of slowing down and not stressing, not worrying, not controlling, not resisting, not overdoing, not overworking … is the best gift we can actually give to ourselves.
What is slow mothering?
Slow Mothering isn’t about the race to get things done.
It’s about the adventure.
Slow Mothering isn’t about the chores and the to-do list.
It’s about the wow moments.
Slow Mothering isn’t about the bills and the car and the errands.
It’s about quiet togetherness.
I’ve talked many times in this space about time management and slowing down and learning to be still and quiet.
Because many of us are highly sensitive moms and our self-care has to be something very beautiful and unique to us.
And that means we have to ban busy from our vocabulary, especially when we’re around our children.
How Do We Master The Art of Slow Mothering?
So this concept of Slow Mothering isn’t new. If you’ve been through the program you already know what I’m talking about, you already have the tools to embrace slow mothering.
Slow mothering is the gift that keeps on giving by offering rest, nourishment, connection and calm.
We master it when we finally decide to wake up early — and more slowly — and not rush the morning away.
We master it when we embrace washing the dishes slowly, and invite our toddler to stand by and help.
We master it when we choose to drink our coffee or tea with two hands slowly. So slowly it gets cold.
We master when we linger longer at bedtime, at nap time, at reading time.
We master it when we lay down and rest because we’ve listened and heard our bodies groan in exhaustion.
It takes hard work and great intention to master the art of slow mothering. For some, it may never be a reality. They will toss out the concept and just return to their overwhelmed busy state. It might be as easy as just asking yourself what you need right now.
But for many others, slow mothering becomes the healing they need to finally rid themselves of the land of bitter and sour. Of anger. Of burn out. And finding a groove in slow mothering might take months or years depending on your motivation to slow down.
One thing is certain. When we take time for Slow Mothering beautiful connections open up to us. We realize just how much time we really do have to enjoy this life — and what matters most. We discover the beauty of a single moment of doing absolutely nothing at all.
And that love and joy spreads and expands to those around us. We laugh more easily. We smile more often. We have a more joyful outlook on our life.