For as long as we can remember, one of our twin daughters has a severe aversion to boredom.
Mostly, what she needs is routine but when a school holiday or summer break or even a regular weekend comes along, she struggles greatly.
It’s not that she can’t be bored. We’re kind of a pretty boring family, honestly. She knows this.
It’s that she’s a sensory seeker and a huge enthusiast (for the Enneagram fans) and that means that she is constantly seeking excitement.
Excitement is not how I would define The Fink Family. 🙂
For a long time, when I was focusing my work around family wellness — which is still a foundation of the Be You™ authenticity and well-being coaching work I do with women now — I kept my daughter’s aversion to boredom and need for routine in the back of my mind.
We thrive as human beings on routines, rituals and habits.
Without grounding daily practices to anchor our days, we can feel adrift and lost.
And so here we are in 2020 where all sense of routines and rituals have been literally upended.
Without a structured school day to guide her along, my daughter has struggled. While she’s much better at handling these unstructured days now at 14 than she was at 9, she’s still really out of alignment with her needs. And while the pandemic has helped her get used to boring a bit more than she had been before …
She still hit a wall of ENOUGH in August.
Things got super tricky.
September was even harder as she realized she needs to be with people. She’s an extrovert (whereas her whole family leans toward introversion even though I am an ambivert.)
And so we’ve been working with her on the exact things I work with myself on and with my clients — maintaining a positive outlook on life and finding joy in what is.
In the case of my daughter and this challenge, we’re focusing today on JOY.
Seeking out joy. Creating joy. Making joy happen.
It is possible.
Just like you chose to thrive in this pandemic on the first day of this challenge.
Now, I am asking you to seek out joy for yourself and those you love.
Joy will get us through.
Joy will help us rise.
Joy will inspire you and thrill you and turn your life around.
Now sure where to start with finding joy? Start with your morning routine by writing a Morning Joy List in your journal. Every morning when you wake up, add at least ONE thing to your JOY list. Keep this joy list close and make it fun for you. You can add anything you want to your joy list. Your joy list will be different from mine.
From my own joy list this morning, I can include …
- early morning coffee and journaling every single day
- yoga to my favorite yoga playlist
- standing under the stars for a few deep breaths
- hugs from my teenagers (!!)
- my fiery girl sitting on her bed writing in her planner.
These are the little things that are bringing me joy right now.
We all need to seek out the joy moments in our days.
We all need to help each other find the joy.
And we all need to spread more joy to each other.
I hope I am doing my part this week with these daily emails and posts. Missed a day? Get caught up now.
Shawn Fink (she/her/hers)
Founder of The Abundant Mama Project