The dishes are piled up.
An email needs sent.
And a doctor’s office visit needs scheduled.
The list of to-dos are endless for a modern mother. Volunteer work. Work-work. Home-keeping. Meal planning and cooking. Child tending.
Life undoes us sometimes.
Recently, a client of mine from a past Abundant Mama Online Program was really feeling perplexed. She knew what she wanted to do as a mother. She had all the Abundant Mama tools that we offer to her … but she couldn’t find the time to do it all.
She was so caught up in what she HAD to do for her life that she couldn’t stop long enough to BE the mom she wanted to be.
She thought she must be missing something — something OTHER moms clearly had under control. She knew that her actions weren’t helping her connect with her children and she was feeling desperate to change.
Why is to so hard to step away and stop doing all the things and find the time to connect with our children or our partners?
When we pull away and do All the Things instead of connecting with our children — or our partner — we create a disconnection that can take months or even years to correct.
And if we never correct course, we may lose that connection forever.
Same goes for our own self-care, in fact.
We disconnect from ourselves when we don’t make time for ourselves. We lose sight of who we are and who we want to be. It’s hard to find ourselves again but when we do it’s magical and blissful.
That’s how our children feel when their mommy finally plays with them — finally enters their room and asks them about their stuff or interests or when daddy asks them to play ball or starts roughhousing for no reason.
Connection with our children is the HEART and SOUL of keeping them happy, thriving and cooperative with YOU.
So if you want well-behaved children, you have to put the T-I-M-E in.
Same for a mindful marriage.
How do we create space for connection and play?
This is the ultimate question — with multiple answers.
In my work with moms in the Abundant Mama Online Program, I can honestly say there isn’t a magic bullet here.
The mindset change is huge .. when we can finally say ENOUGH. I’ve done enough. I am enough. I have enough. The goal of the program is to help you finally believe it!
And to finally, finally, finally let go (at least a little) of all those expectations we carry for ourselves and our lives.
In my own life, there isn’t a one-stop way to stop doing all the things and just be done with them.
In fact, the answer is in learning to understand the WHY behind our actions.
The truth is that we have to create space for play and connection or it easily becomes viewed as time wasting and not necessary compared to more productive tasks.
But it is.
Connection is the heart and soul of a positive and loving family and making time for it should be just as important as washing the dishes.
But it can be hard to make that distinction if we aren’t sure WHY we’re doing it in the first place.
When we focus our energy on what we hope to gain and create space in our hearts — and in our people’s hearts — we then understand WHY we must do better at connecting and why it must come before checking the emails and responding to a text or sweeping the floors.
- The WHY is the motivation to hurry through the dishes.
- The WHY is the courage behind unplugging from that device. To stop reading that book. To put the vacuum away. To get home early from work. To get up early on the weekends to make more time and space for each other.
- The WHY is at the heart of who you want to be.
If you aren’t sure of your WHY, I will lead you through creating your very own Abundant Mama Guiding Philosophy. Check it out now. It’s FREE.
Your why needs to be at the center of your interactions and decisions. It needs to be front and center of your daily routines.
So that when the time comes to either do the dishes or play that game — you will know exactly what to do.
If it’s the dishes, it’s the dishes.
If it’s the game, it’s the game.
The answer will be clear.