Today, I’m so honored to once again turn this space over to a “Real Life” Abundant Mama willing to share her story. Please welcome Quillin, a 2014 Abundant Mama alumni, and a current member of The Abundant Mama Peace Circle — a coaching circle I offer only to Abundant Mama alumni of the 4-Week class. It is such an honor to share Quillin’s personal Abundant Mama Journey with you today. Enjoy!
When I first learned about The Abundant Mama Project, I was frazzled at work, desperate to squeeze everything I thought I was supposed to be doing into my days.
I was drinking a lot and coming to terms with the fact that my vision for a big family wasn’t going to happen. My marriage seemed overly stretched and my partner definitely wasn’t being prioritized in the scope of things.
I knew there had to be another way but was so tired and over it all that I couldn’t dig my own way out. When I finally joined AMP for the September 2014 course, I hoped to learn strategies and tools to change my daily routines and re-shape how I felt and thought about my life and my family.
How it all started
During my AMP course, I was really pushed to reflect on a theme related to having it all. I had always been so negative and focused on the scarcity instead of the abundance all around me. The whole section on gratitude helped me reframe and notice when I usually wouldn’t.
I really learned that what I’ve got in my world is beautiful and enough.
I also started building a creative arts practice through journaling, photography, and painting.
Shawn encouraged us to take time to fulfill our needs and gave a variety of self-care tips and tools. And the ability to learn from other Abundant Mamas through the duration of the course contributed greatly to my growth.
I learned to embrace the imperfect parts of myself and the people I love more fully which has allowed for an abundance of love and joy to flourish.
I have implemented the Daily Five gratitude practice and this has really helped me reframe and take a few minutes each day to focus on the abundance in my life. I’ve also learned to use mantras and touchstones to help me reset throughout the day. Some of my favorite mantras are “Be the mom” and “Lead with Love” which I use from time to time even if uttering them under my breath in tense moments.
I learned lots of ways to use play to diffuse situations with my child or approach her in different ways. I am seeing some real positive changes in my parenting style and in my relationship with my partner and my stepchildren too. I am feeling more confident as a mother.
I am letting little things go more…not 100 percent, but I’m paying attention more.
On being a more confident mother
My partner and I experienced our first night without children at home in 3 ½ years. I owe it in part to my AMP work which helped me realize that nurturing myself and my relationship with my partner is an important part of my being able to show up fully for motherhood.
It also speaks volumes for my work on letting go and trusting others to help when we need it and letting myself ask for that help.
My life now feels more manageable and more meaningful no matter what I’m doing or who I’m with.
I take breaths throughout my day. I’ve committed to movement every day and creating time for me to reflect or to create sometimes with my family and sometimes alone.
I’ve put to bed the falsehood that I can “have it all” and come to know that I have enough and that I am enough.
My gratitude practice continues to inspire me to notice the abundance in my life and whenever I go off the rails (as does happen from time to time – mothers are human) I have tools to bring me back more quickly and more intact than before.
I feel confident as a mother and as a partner and I feel committed to ongoing growth and change in both those areas and as a woman in general.
About Quillin: A Texan by birth and a Virginian by accident, Quillin Drew Musgrave lives in a blended family with two sons (22 and 19) and two daughters (10 and 3) – the three-year-old being the only constant child in the house! She works & volunteers in the sexual and domestic violence field and operates a vegetarian cafe with her partner. An avid music lover, Quillin continues to collect vinyl albums, has a slew of musical instruments throughout her home, and has crossed seeing Nick Cave live off her big to-do list.
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