One of my favorite things about The Abundant Mama Project is the stories. I am a journalist at heart so this is probably no real surprise. I have spent my adult life telling other people’s stories, which is why I am so fond of my Abundant Mama series.
I’m honored to give you one final voice this week of an Abundant Mama.
Beryl Ayn Young, who partners with me for Project 52: Stay Awake and who is offering her own e-course for mamas right now. Below is Beryl’s story about how she has found abundance as a mother.
I used to hang onto expectation so tight that I might implode from squeezing so tightly. A planner by nature, if things didn’t fit into my grand scheme I’d break out in a sweat, feel the lump of anxiety in my belly, and completely shut down when things didn’t work out as planned.
It was fairly clear every last ounce of my energy was being displaced into all the wrong places.
I was scheduled, so much so that there was never any wiggle room to simply, breathe. We wasted so much times just trying to make things work into my master plan, that if something didn’t I was consumed by thoughts of anxiousness, failure or guilt.
It quickly became an exhausting way to live.
I used to think abundance would be achieved if everything went according to my schedule and I had control over the outcome.
But I discovered abundance was just the opposite.
I found that when I started acknowledging that lovely heart shaped pit of anxiousness in my tummy, and loved it — truly loved it, it slowly and almost magically began to fade away.
So did the master schedule and the need to be in control.
I was simply free to allow life to happen.
It opened space to explore my passions and capture them in photographs. I clung to those pictures as my constant reminder of how abundance feels.
- The sweet smile and sticky fingers of a first summer ice cream cone
- Belly laughs
- A cool summer breeze surrounded by fields of green and flowers.
- Cups of coffee
- The fresh start a new notebook and pen provides.
- Fresh fruits and veggies.
- Happy feet
I worried less about the stuff that was making me feel icky and guilty: a sink full of dirty dishes, my piles and piles of laundry, the blog post that wasn’t written but needed to be published the next day, a lazy afternoon spent in front of the tv instead of playing outside, the toys strewn across the family room floor.
I played more uninhibited with my kiddo and family, I started to rediscover who I was meant to become after becoming a mom, and I left go of expectations of how my life should be unfolding.
:: all photos by Beryl Ayn Young
Beryl Ayn Young is a wife, mama, teacher, and photographer offering photography lessons and classes to nourish the mind, body, and soul. She’s the creator of the Radiate E-course offering moms a 12-week journey into their own self care practice from behind the lens of a camera. Check out her site for all the details.